keyholders Archives - Cut to the Chaste

Review of the Oxy-Shop Monthly Keyholder Service, a monitored chastity keyholding system for fee, managed by Mistress Elena.

I’ve finished my one-month subscription with the Oxy-Shop Monthly Keyholder Service and am ready to offer my honest review.

A while ago I was looking for a key safe and found my way to the Oxy-Shop website. Browsing the site, I not only found the key safe I was seeking but also discovered Oxy-Shop offered a for fee monthly keyholding service. What intrigued me was that the service is managed by an actual Pro Domme and the monthly fee started at only $35 per month.

Oxy-Shop also offers 3-month and 6-month keyholding subscriptions for $95 and $200 respectively that reduce the monthly cost even more. Having paid far more for professional monthly keyholding services, I decided to try the service even though my expectations for a personalized experience were quite low given the low monthly fee. Here’s what I discovered.

What You Need to Use the Service

A lockable chastity device suitable for long-term use
The Oxy-Shop keyholder service set (Included free with your first month of paid service)

A metal key safe and a generous supply of plastic number locks to use with the safe comprise the keyholder service set. The set alone is a $25 value, so essentially, you’re paying only $10 for the first month of keyholding when you buy a one-month subscription.

How the Oxy-Shop Keyholder Service Works

Once you receive your key safe and plastic numbered locks by mail, you email Oxy-Shop at tasks@oxy-shop.com once you are ready to start. You will then receive a welcome letter from Mistress Elena with her initial instructions. In my case, I received the welcome letter the day after I emailed to say I was ready to start.

Once you begin, each day you email a proof of lock photo and every other day a proof of lock video to Mistress Elena. Something I didn’t know and that wasn’t explained in the welcome letter is that you should send the daily emails as replies to the welcome letter. The first few days I sent original emails each time with the images and videos attached, so Mistress Elena had to email me a second time with instructions to use replies not original emails each day because that makes it more difficult for her to keep track. That’s understandable as I’m sure she is managing many locked men simultaneously. Once we ironed that out, I submitted the required photos and videos each day without further problems.

In addition to managing your chastity, Mistress Elena also sends task assignments periodically. My understanding was there would be only one task for the month, so I didn’t expect that to amount to much. But Mistress Elena provided a new task assignment each week, all of which I found quite enjoyable to do for her and that added interest to the experience and made it even more pleasant. Out of respect for Mistress Elena’s work product, I won’t share what the tasks entailed. But I will say each was a fun activity that didn’t require much time to complete and I generally had on hand whatever I needed to complete them. So, there was no real added expense involved.

From the moment she tells you to lock up, Mistress Elena is in control. She decides when and if you may unlock and whether you get any sexual pleasure or release. In my case, I remained locked for the first eight days of the month. Then Mistress Elena instructed me to unlock for a break, but warned me not to touch or play with her property while unlocked.

It surprised me that she left me unlocked for five days before telling me to lock up again. And that would have made the five days more like honor chastity than lockable device chastity had I followed those instructions. But I only used the opportunity to unlock to do a deep cleaning and locked my device back on after less than a half hour of freedom on the first day. Since I’m approaching two years of remaining locked continuously, I wasn’t willing to end the streak for the purposes of reviewing a keyholder service, so I admit I didn’t follow the instructions to remain unlocked for the five-day period.

Once Mistress Elena had locked me back up (officially), I remained locked for the duration of the month. During the month, Mistress Elena did not allow me any sexual release which was fine by me actually. So, if you decide to try this service, don’t automatically assume you will get permission for sex or masturbation during the month even though the information presented on the website mentions it as a possibility. Also, I expect Mistress Elena decides on a case-by-case basis how much time she will allow a person to remain locked and unlocked. So, your experience would likely differ from mine.

All communication with Mistress Elena is by email, so don’t expect anything more than that. In the past I have sometimes had phone, text, or Skype contact with professionals who have managed my chastity, but I found communicating only by email perfectly acceptable.

Mistress Elena notifies you two days before the month of service ends, I assume so that you have the chance to extend the service for another month or months if you choose.

What I Didn’t Like About the Service

There were several things I expected not to like about the service, but in the end, there is only one thing I can criticize. You don’t receive daily feedback on the proof photos and videos and after several days it feels as if you’re only submitting them to a black hole and no one even looks at them. But given the low monthly fee charged, that’s understandable. Even if Mistress Elena is only keyholding for twenty locked men at a time, sending daily emails would require a lot of her time. And for all I know, she may be keyholding for far more than only twenty men at a time. So, in the absence of feedback, all you can do is assume she found your photos and videos acceptable since I’m sure you would hear about it if she was displeased with your efforts.

Something I expected I wouldn’t like was the absence of a personalized experience. I’ve had several professional keyholders who have provided me exceptionally personalized services, but I paid anywhere between $100 and $200 per month for those services. For $35 per month, I certainly didn’t expect it to be as personal as my past experiences. I didn’t expect it to feel personal at all. But Mistress Elena surprised me and actually did an excellent job making the experience feel personal. Her emails were always brief, but personal enough it was easy to see she doesn’t just send out form emails and she is quick to praise you when she feels you’re deserving which lets you know she does review the photos and videos you send her each day. I could also sense she puts effort into creating the task assignments so that they are personalized for the individual.

In the beginning, I felt sending a daily proof photo and video every other day a somewhat onerous and needless requirement. But as time passed, I realized the requirement didn’t seem burdensome and actually helped keep me engaged. By the end of the month, I looked forward to taking the photos and making the videos each day knowing Mistress Elena was looking at them. So, I found myself trying my best to be creative in hopes of impressing and pleasing her. Based on the feedback I received, I feel I accomplished that.

Precautions When Using the Oxy-Shop Keyholding Service

In my opinion, this is a service for men who have a good basic understanding of how to safely wear a lockable chastity device. You are 100% responsible for your own safety while using the service. So, I wouldn’t recommend it for beginners who would be better served by finding an experienced keyholder offering a more personalized service tailored to experience level. But for someone who has some experience under his belt, doesn’t have a keyholder, and wants one, this service could be exactly what you’re looking for. It’s basic, but comes at a very reasonable and inexpensive price. And unlike many other affordable remote keyholding services you can find on the interwebs, a real person manages this one. In that regard, this service is truly one of a kind.

Also, I think this service is best for guys who wear open-style cages rather than closed tube devices. At one point I went more than two straight weeks locked with no opportunity to remove my device briefly for a deep cleaning. That wasn’t an issue because of the type devices I wear. But two weeks is too long to go between deep cleanings for guys wearing something like the Steelworxx Steelheart or any of the popular resin cages with mostly closed tubes. You need a device you can clean well in the shower without removing it.

Final Thoughts

On a scale of one to five, I rate the Oxy-Shop Monthly Keyholder Service a solid four and have no reservations recommending it to those with moderate experience wearing a lockable chastity device. The price is unbeatable for anything close to what this professional service provides. The experience isn’t as personal as other services I’ve used (which were significantly more expensive) but personal enough to give you an authentic feeling of chastity under the control of a professional keyholder who is legitimately in charge.

I liked the service well enough that I’ve already signed up for another month. And if the second month goes as well as the first, Mistress Elena may well become my permanent keyholder for the foreseeable future. The cost of the service is well within my budget, fulfills my basic needs for keyholding, and I’ve enjoyed it. I’ve tired of self-locking for now and had been considering engaging another full-time keyholder for a while. And having looked at all my options, the Oxy-Shop service seems the best available for now.

Disclaimer: I paid for my month of keyholding service using my own funds, and I have no relationship with Oxy-Shop beyond being a satisfied customer. All opinions expressed are my own.

And a Few Tips on How to Do it Right

I’ve come across a good many websites offering advice to a guy on how to explain male chastity to his wife or girlfriend when he feels the time is right to bring up the subject and ask his partner to lock his penis in a chastity device.

The thing is, these websites are invariably written by men who seem not to understand that women with their intuitive nature will see right through these flimsy, ill-conceived strategies to win them over. Using many of the suggestions I’ve seen could doom your conversation to fail. Rather than win your partner over to the idea of chastity, you might only provoke a heated argument. Let’s have a look at some of the suggestions you should avoid using.

1. Wearing a chastity device will make me more attentive to your needs.

Guess how 99.9% of women will respond to this. “Why must I lock your cock in a chastity cage for you be more attentive to my needs? Why aren’t you already more attentive to my needs?”

Having an inattentive partner who only gives them his full attention when he wants sex is one of the top complaints on most every woman’s list of her partner’s shortcomings. That makes this first suggestion a potential land mine and a very bad idea. You’re admitting you aren’t nearly attentive enough to her needs while telling her if she gives you something you want, then you will work on the deficiency. A woman will see this for what it is immediately, a quid pro quo offer where the something you’re offering is something she should already be getting.

Sure, it’s true. If she locks up your cock, you will very likley be far more attentive to her needs. But don’t even go there. This argument will not help your cause.

2. Wearing a chastity device will make me more affectionate and loving and I'll desire you even more.

Here again is a statement that is probably true. It is an expected effect of chastity and orgasm denial. But, again, we are firmly in the territory of something you realize you have been remiss about, but you will only be motivated to improve if your wife or girlfriend gives you something you want. Is it really a good idea to use this argument with your partner? No, it is not.

3. Wearing a chastity device will make me less likely to look at other women and less tempted to cheat.

Seriously? Is there a guy who would really say this to his wife or girlfriend? Would it really sway a woman towards the idea of putting her man in chastity if he tells her he would stop looking lustfully at other women and less likley to have an affair. I don’t think so. And, trust me on this. She knows you look lustfully at other women and it bothers her. It isn’t a topic you should bring up while trying to persuade to her to agree to something you want. Similarly, telling her a hunk of steel or plastic dangling between your legs is all that might prevent you from cheating on her one day isn’t a good strategy.

4. If you lock me in chastity, I'll be more helpful around the house.

The female response? “Why aren’t you already helping around the house? Why must I continually nag you every time I ask you to do the smallest chore?” Enough said.

5. I'll do things for you like giving you a massage, brushing your hair, and giving you the best oral sex ever.

Do you really want her to ask why you don’t already occasionally do some of those lovely things for her? Because she will if you use this argument.

Factually, all of the things listed above are benefits your wife can reasonably expect that chastity and orgasm denial will give her. The problem is, they are all benefits she already has every right to expect from you and is probably not seeing often enough to suit her. That’s what makes them all bad arguments to use.

Understanding the Perspective of Your Wife or Girlfriend

As men, I sometimes believe we don’t truly understand how big an ask it is when we tell our significant others we have chastity desires and request they enforce our chastity. What often happens when we bring up the subject is they respond with something like,” Well, I see how this is going to benefit you. But what about me? What do I get out of it?”

That’s a perfectly reasonable response and so it’s something you must be ready for. But you have to be smart about describing how you being in chastity is going to benefit her. To do that, you must put yourself in your wife or girlfriend’s shoes.

I’m not suggesting you try to con your partner or try to manipulate her into getting on board with your chastity idea. You should be honest, but should present the benefits in a way where she clearly sees how putting you in chastity will benefit her.

Things to Say That Are More Aligned With Your Partner's Perspective

(1) Admit your shortcomings and explain that you want and need to learn how to serve your wife or girlfriend better in order to make her life easier and happier. Then explain you believe chastity can help you do that because it will remove the focus from your needs so you can learn to be the kind of husband or boyfriend she truly deserves.

(2) Admit that during sex in the past, you have come to understand you were too focused on getting the experience you wanted and not focusing enough on her needs and desires in the bedroom. Explain you want to learn how to better focus on what she wants to make her sex life more enjoyable and fulfilling. Add that wearing a chastity cage removes you from the equation which will help you learn to focus all your energy on her pleasure and desires during intimacy, and that her pleasure will become your pleasure.

(3) Admit that you have selfishly wasted too much energy on masturbation and wearing a chastity device will help you learn to reserve your energy for higher purposes, such as pleasing her.

(4) Tell her that having her enforce your chastity means you will receive guidance and constructive criticism from her about how to perform daily tasks and doing your fair share around the house which will reduce the burden of household chores for her. Tell her you welcome her assigning you chores she wants you to do.

These suggestions may seem similar to the five arguments listed previously that I advise against using. But here is the difference. What the first five strategies were really about was a man who wants something for him and his fetish and he’s disguising his desires and his needs as benefits for his wife. The last four suggestions are a more honest approach that clearly spell out the benefits the hoped for future keyholder can expect.

I can’t stress this enough. Once you have made the decision to share your chastity desires with your wife or partner, and have gathered the courage to initiate the conversation, honesty is the best policy. It’s perfectly fine to explain that you have been fascinated by the thought of wearing a chastity device for a while. You can even share some of your fantasies with her if you wish, as long as they aren’t fantasies she might find threatening or taboo. But mostly, you want to focus on how chastity will benefit her and the relationship.

Other Things to Avoid

One thing to keep in mind is your choice of words when raising the subject of your chastity desires. The words you choose to use will have a big impact on her receptiveness to the idea. Unless you and your significant other are already involved significantly in kink, avoid words like domination, submission, discipline, punishment, and slave. These are all terms that a woman who is largely in the vanilla camp when it comes to intimacy might find off-putting.

As you speak to her about chastity, don’t be forceful. Don’t push the idea of keyholding on her. And after you’ve said your piece, give her plenty of time to consider all you’ve said and to do her own research if she wants. Give her the opportunity to make up her own mind about your desires and the future of chastity in the relationship. That’s the only way she will ever develop a sense of ownership about her role as the keyholder.

Don’t tell her about your mental image of your ideal Dominatrix, or favorite submission scenario. She may not be able to relate such things to your relationship with her.

Don't Bring Up Other Kinky Fantasies Now

Sometimes guys have other sexual desires that they feel go hand in hand with chastity. One example is forced feminization. I’d recommend you don’t tell her you want to explore the sissy life when you first bring up the subject of enforced chastity because that is probably already going to be enough for your wife or partner to get her head around. The other things you may have in mind should wait until later. I’m all for honesty and transparency, but there is also such a thing as too much information.

Overall, agreeing to enforcing your chastity and acting as your keyholder must be your partner’s decision and not one she makes only to please you instead of something she really wants. That’s the only way chastity can be successfully introduced into your relationship.

In 2021, I am committed to posting more informative articles aimed at women whose husbands or boyfriends have brought up adding chastity to their relationships. That’s the focus of the next post.

Tag Archives: keyholders

Review: Oxy-Shop Monthly Keyholder Service