teasing and denial Archives - Cut to the Chaste

Only twelve days remain before the start of the holy month of Locktober, the crown jewel of male chastity. In less than two weeks, determined (or forced) penis owning humans everywhere hope to be on their metal as they face the annual 31-day crucible that will reveal whether they possess the classical virtue of fortitude — or not. Whoever takes part in Locktober this year, I will certainly be among them.

As Locktober draws nigh, I’ve felt increasingly anxious about what Lucie has planned. Not that I’ve doubted for a moment that we would take part in Locktober. My concern was more about whether she had any plan to unlock me and allow me a release before October 1. After all, by month’s end, she will have kept me locked for 88 days and orgasm free for 154 days, all while subjecting me to intense teasing that at times has bordered on cruelty. Just when I had girded myself last Sunday to broach the subject, Lucie brought it up first.

After telling me she had been thinking about Locktober and was much looking forward to our first Locktober together, she informed me she had a prepping for Locktober plan to ease us into it. Lucie then said she was replacing our current teasing and denial program with a new ten to fourteen day prepping program, during which she would give me two chances to earn a release. So far, so good. But then she crushed my hopes by adding this caution.

“But it is very possible that you will fail both opportunities. Then you would have to go into Locktober without a release.”

When she first mentioned giving me two opportunities to earn a release, I admit to feeling suspicious. That’s because after four months, I have learned well how her devious mind works. Munificence is not among Lucie’s many endearing attributes. Of course, that isn’t her fault. She is a proper sadist and what sadist is a sadist who misses any opportunity to deal out mental cruelty to her chastity slave? So, I strongly suspect Lucie has some trick up her sleeve that guarantees I’ll fail whatever opportunities for release she offers. And, of course, she didn’t offer any details about the “opportunities.” As Lucie is fond of reminding me:

“Locked boys needn’t spend their time worrying about the things over which they have no control.”

So, since the weekend we have embarked on her new diabolical teasing and denial plan that is even more intense than what we had already been doing for about the past nine weeks. So far it has featured more intense edging sessions and a stronger focus on erotic humiliation.

Not that I don’t admire and appreciate Lucie’s seemingly inexhaustible creativity, but it doesn’t feel like we’re easing into anything, much less Locktober. I could be wrong, but I’ve already accepted I’m probably going into Locktober with no unlock and no orgasm. But, hey. No one ever said life is fair, right?

Accordingly, I have made my mental preparations for Locktober as well as they can be made. If I must endure another 31 days of enforced chastity after this month’s close, so be it. I once heard this stoic line in a movie that I liked.

“One may stare into the light until one becomes the light.”

Perhaps I can use that bit of moral relativism to get through Locktober without a release. It represents a common observation of Nietzsche and others that we become like that we fight against, since we must do so in order to survive. I suppose that is just as true for denial.

Well wishes to all who are prepping for Locktober.

All too often, guys new to chastity think that a chastity device is the magic, but it’s not. The magic is the euphoric high from constant arousal and frustration felt beginning after the first two or three days of having your penis locked in a cage, depending on the man’s level of chastity experience. That’s why teasing is important and these top solo teasing tips for self-locked guys might help.

Sustained enjoyment of the time spent wearing a cock cage depends on frequent teasing. The cage only forces you to redirect your sexual energy elsewhere instead of allowing it to escape the tip of your penis when having sex or wanking. If you want to ruin the experience of self-locking, ignore the teasing, and you will likely find it deeply unsatisfying.

One Disadvantage to Self-Enforced Male Chastity

One disadvantage to self-enforced male chastity is not having a keyholder to provide teasing. So, if your circumstances mean you must go solo and self-lock, you must also provide your own teasing if you want to have a meaningful, enjoyable experience. Guys who have self-locked for a while probably already know the importance of frequent self-teasing and what works for them. But for guys new to the lifestyle and self-locking, these tips can help.

One of the Best Things About the Male Chastity Journey

One of the best things about the male chastity journey is guys often learn, many for the first time, that the penis is not the only male erogenous zone—an area of the male body that has heightened sensitivity, the stimulation of which may generate a sexual response. For many men, focusing on the penis has always given them the pleasure they were looking for, so they haven’t bothered looking elsewhere. But losing access to the penis while wearing a cock cage is an opportunity to learn about other areas of your body that respond to stimulation and produce some satisfying sexual fun. Following are three suggestions for teasing activities that will help you do just that.

#1 Butt Play

Let’s start with one area of the body that offers effective and satisfying self-teasing, one of my personal favorites, butt play. The anus is full of sensitive nerve endings. Add this to its proximity to the prostate, and you have yourself a literal sexual teasing hot spot. Since some people still regard anal play as taboo, not everyone has explored it in a meaningful way. But from prostate massages to anal sex toys, rear entry can produce some very satisfactory results when self-teasing, no ifs, ands, or (pun intended) butts.

If you’re new to the world of anal pleasure, get ready to discover that the anal area can be an intensely pleasurable play zone. While many people are more than happy to just play around the entrance, adding penetration to your sexual playlist can add even more satisfying sensations. But first, a few basics.

In essence, the purpose of the anus is to expel waste. So while penetrating your anus can definitely be pleasurable, that’s sort of the opposite the anus is designed to do. Also, unlike a vagina that lubricates itself and helps ease the way, the anus has no self-lubricating properties. That’s why the mantra of anal play is to use lube, lube, and more lube. Without using the appropriate type and amount of lubrication, you run a genuine risk of damaging the anus’s extremely delicate tissues.

There are many types of lubricants available for butt play, but adequately covering lubrication would require an article all its own. So, I’ll leave it to you to do your own homework as information abounds on the internet about personal lubricants.

Anal Training

In addition to lubrication, if you’re new to anal play, stretching your butt hole is the other key component of pleasurable backdoor play. It isn’t nearly as scary as it sounds, and no, it isn’t permanent.

Technically, anal stretching is anything that gradually stretches the anus and allows you to insert things that you couldn’t comfortably accommodate in the past. This means that for absolute beginners who’ve never tried anal experiences before, it might mean working up gradually from a single finger to larger objects. Anal stretching, achieved through anal training, is surprisingly simple to do. Once you can comfortably insert a finger, all you need are anal toys, plenty of lubricants, and some time and patience.

Anal Training Kits

Adult toy manufacturers provide everything you need for anal training in a single kit. Anal training kits vary in price, but you can find a kit like this one on Amazon with four medical-grade silicone anal plugs for under twenty bucks. This kit also comes with an enema bulb that helps keep things clean and a tube of lubricant. Instead of regurgitating the information on anal training, here is a link to an excellent anal training guide on Kinkly.com.

How Often Should You Train

How often should you train to get the desired results? It comes down to your comfort level but aim to train once or twice a day, at least five days a week, for 5 to 10 minutes at a time. Stick with the smallest size for 1 to 2 weeks and gradually increase the time you keep the plug inserted before moving to the next size up. Once you feel no resistance or discomfort when inserting, then congrats. You’re ready to step up to the next size.

Incorporating Anal Play Into Your Teasing Routine

Incorporating anal play into your teasing routine is easy, and there are countless variations. But I’ll give you a few examples of how I do it to get you started.

I insert a butt plug most days and then go about my usual routine. Once you get accustomed to anal penetration with toys, there is nothing you can’t do with one inserted. I’ve gone to the gym, taken long walks, and ran for miles with them inserted. I’ve had them in at work and while out running errands. Variety, as it’s said, is the spice of life. So I often change it up. I might leave a plug inserted for several hours at a time some days, and others, I leave one in for a half-hour and then remove it. Then later in the day, I’ll put it back in for another half hour. Butt plugs are one of my go-to strategies for keeping my sexual arousal peaking throughout the day.

Besides anal plugs, I have an assortment of dildos, prostate massagers, and vibrating butt toys I regularly use for teasing. One of my favorites is a smooth, Pyrex glass dildo that functions well as a prostate stimulator. It’s the toy I used to discover the joys of prostate milking. Additionally, a dildo with a suction cup base can provide intense faux pegging sessions. So, the options for toys and play activities are almost limitless and will go a long way toward providing the teasing you need to stay enthralled with male chastity.

#2 Life on the Edge

Edging (also called surfing, peaking, teasing, and more) is the practice of stopping yourself from reaching orgasm right when you’re on the cusp—the metaphorical “edge” right before you fall off the cliff into sexual climax. It’s another go-to technique I use to maintain high arousal and do edging sessions twice each week.

Experimentation is essential in learning to edge without accidentally going past the point of no return where orgasm is inevitable. Only through practice do you learn to recognize the cues that you are close to orgasm and ejaculation. For guys in chastity, it’s better to stop the stimulation sooner rather than later. Then wait until the urge to orgasm subsides before continuing.

You can remove your chastity device temporarily and use good old-fashioned wanking to do an edging session, or if you have a vibrator, you can simply touch it to your cage and do edges that way. I use both techniques but find I have more control and am less prone to accidents when using the manual wanking method. Also, you can use websites designed to help you with edging. For example, this article on the Joi and Asmr website has links to three of the best edging websites on the internet.

If you’ve never tried edging, this article on Healthline.com is a good primer. It explains what edging is, its benefits, and ways to do it.

#3 Balls to the Wall Ball Sex

Guys give so much attention to their penises that we often ignore our testicles during solo play. But locking your penis in a cage is an opportunity to get more in touch with your balls. And ball sex can help keep you all hot and bothered while practicing solo male chastity.

Fondling, caressing, tugging, twisting, stretching, or even on occasion, slapping the testicles can be pleasurable. However, as opposed to the penis itself, which millions of years of evolution have made somewhat durable, the testicles predominantly aren’t and are generally very sensitive. So, it’s best to avoid excess tension, torsion, impacts, or squeezing as there’s a risk of injury, including the permanent variety. I find that giving my testicles, while tightly trapped in the base ring of a chastity device, an extended fondling and massage with massage oil is not only arousing but soothing.

Do any of these tips for self-teasing resonate with you?

Whatever you choose to do, don’t skip the teasing if you’re practicing self-enforced chastity. Make time for it. And don’t forget there are things like insert and forget anal plugs you can do that require no time at all away from your usual daily routine. Keeping your arousal peaking will make self-locking so much more enjoyable and meaningful since teasing coupled with denial is what gets those pleasure hormones and endorphins flowing.

Tag Archives: teasing and denial

Prepping for Locktober

Top Solo Teasing Tips for Self-Locked Guys