measuring for a chastity device Archives

Mail Call: Chastity Related Questions December 2023

By Chaste on Tuesday, December 12, 2023

It’s time for the December 2023 edition of Mail Call, where I answer reader submitted chastity related questions.

This month, I’ve received three questions from readers about things I think might hold interest for our wider audience, so let’s get to them.

Hasn’t Quite Cracked the Right Fit and Style for Long-Term Wear

This question comes from reader ML…

Hey,
I’ve been a (not very great) chastity user for around 6 years now. Unfortunately, due to cost and difficulties finding a comfy fit, I’m still yet to wear one for more than 4 days. It’s great to see blogs and info on people who really enjoy wearing them too! I’ve mostly got on with metal ones. But want to figure out an affordable option for a light but secure material for longer term wear. What advice would you have for someone who still hasn’t quite cracked the right fit and style in finding one? My concern is I’ll spend big money on one. But the money will be wasted due to the fit not being quite right.
Any advice welcome! Stay locked!

There are two main reasons guys never get past wearing a chastity device comfortably for more than a few days—trying to go from zero to hero too quickly or not spending the time to take proper measurements before buying a device.

Given the vast number of relatively inexpensive devices available today that offer a reasonable fit (except for guys with some physical anomaly that prevents them from wearing a ball-trap device), I believe anyone who wants to can adjust to wearing a chastity device long-term. They just have to find a well-fitting device within their budget and give their body enough time to adjust to wearing it.

Patience Grasshopper

We’re all unique. Some of us have more sensitive skin than others. Some of us have lower tolerance for discomfort than others. So, there is no way I or anyone can offer a one-size fits all solution to the question: how much time does it take to get accustomed to wearing a chastity device comfortably?

I don’t have overly sensitive skin and I rate my tolerance for discomfort as average. Under the guidance of a very experienced and knowledgeable professional keyholder, I went from putting on a chastity device for the first time to wearing in 24/7 in two weeks. But that won’t work for every guy.

I’m confident this 3-week schedule for beginners I recently updated will work for most guys. But if you try it and experience excessive chafing, broken skin, or pain, then customize the recommended schedule by dropping back a step and giving it a few more days or another week at that step before advancing to the next step again. Of course, you’re never going to adjust to wearing a poorly fitting device.

Measure, Measure, Measure

Don’t skip the measuring step before ordering a chastity device. Yes, those who have followed this blog for a while probably think I sound like a broken record. But I can’t stress enough how important measuring is to getting a good fitting device. You can probably find a thousand different ways to measure for a chastity device on the web. If you’re looking at getting a particular device and the manufacturer gives measurement instructions, by all means, use those. But as far as generic instructions go, this method is as good as any and better than most.

First, using a ruler or measuring tape, Measure your penis when flaccid (not shriveled) and at its smallest. Take this measurement at least three times on three consecutive days at about the same time of day. Then either total the measurements, and divide by three or go with the shortest of the three as your flaccid length measurement. I like a tight fit, so I always subtract 3/4 inch from my final length measurement.

Measuring the circumference of your flaccid penis isn’t necessary unless you’re ordering a custom cage. That’s because manufacturers use a standard cage inside diameter aimed at the average. That will work for most guys, so I wouldn’t bother with this measurement if you’re getting an off-the-shelf device.

Measure for the base ring by measuring the circumference of an imaginary circle running across the top of the base of your penis where it meets your body and beneath your scrotum, and back to the top of your penis base. The best way is to use a length of string, roughly close to the thickness of a base ring. Wrap it over the base of the penis and beneath the scrotum. Pull it tight, but not so tight that it presses into your flesh. Mark the string where the string overlaps on the top of your penis base. Then measure that length with a ruler or tape measure. This measurement is the circumference of the imaginary circle, so you must divide the result by 3.14 (pi) to get the diameter of the base ring you need. As an example, your measurement is 6-1/4 inches. 6.25/3.14=1.99 inches. (Round up to 2 inches). Here is an even more accurate method to determine base ring size.

Chastity device manufacturer Mature Metal sells a set of nine plastic sizing rings for $30 with sizes ranging from 1-1/8″ to 2-1/8″ and this is an excellent investment if you want to get the exact size base ring needed. Just experiment until you find the ring size you can comfortably wear and that doesn’t restrict blood circulation. Many manufacturers only supply one ring with a device, so you need to get this right the first time to avoid spending more money to get a different size if you get it wrong.

Metal or Plastic?

With your measurements in hand, you first must choose between metal and plastic. When I first started chastity, I only wanted stainless steel. And I have several steel devices, many of them custom-made devices. But I now prefer 3D printed plastic cages and have since acquired several of those. They aren’t custom-made, but still fit very well and feel very comfortable for long-term wear. My advice is to start with plastic. You can always transition to steel later once you’ve mastered wearing a device for lengthy periods. And you may decide you like plastic, anyway.

My Current Beginner Device Recommendations

The beginner cages I now recommend for beginners are the Kink3D Cobra and the House of Denial Hera. Both are 3D printed from high-quality nylon material. I consider them equal in quality. Neither is cheap, but the Hera (about $125 USD for all sizes) costs a little less than the Cobra (about $170). Kink3D offers an excellent sizing chart on the website, and House of Denial gives exact measurements on the website. So, it’s easy to find the right size using the measurements you take before ordering.

Yes, the internet is awash with cheap counterfeit Cobras by foreign manufacturers available on sites like Amazon, Etsy, and eBay (and many others) who have copied the Kink3D design. I’ve bought and reviewed a few of them in years past for the benefit of guys who just couldn’t afford the original, and got a few which were of reasonable quality and that fit well. But I no longer recommend buying knock-offs. The last one I bought was very poor quality and while advertised as 3D printed was actually molded resin. Despite the seller’s claims, you can’t be sure what material they have used and you can’t count on it being hypoallergenic or bacteria resistant. It’s your decision, but buyer beware. I think you would be better off to save up for a Hera or authentic Cobra.

Once you’ve found a plastic device that fits and you know your cage length and base ring size, then you can confidently spend the $300 to $400 to get a high-quality, custom-fitted stainless steel device if your heart is still set on metal.

Can You Help Me Find a Dominant Woman?

Because the email I received included personal details and I’m committed to protecting the privacy of readers who ask questions, I’m only posting the pertinent details of this question from reader Steve…

I have searched for years to find a woman to dominate me and cuckold me. There has to be someone that would spend time with me. Any help would be a blessing.

My assumption here is you are asking me for advice on how you can find this woman of your dreams who will dominate and cuckold you. In the email, you shared deeply personal circumstances that I feel sympathetic about. But my answer to the question is probably not what you want to hear. Still, I always strive to give honest and hopefully helpful answers to the questions readers send.

Given the personal details you shared with me, I believe your odds of finding the partner you seek through the usual ways we meet women, date, and form relationships are extremely low. Not zero, but definitely within spitting distance of zero. Your age is one factor I considered in making this assessment.

I believe your best bet for finding someone willing to explore your desires with you is to hire a professional instead of wasting time seeking a romantic relationship that’s unlikely to happen. Not that you couldn’t find someone to date, but the chances of finding someone to date interested in sharing the relationship you desire with you are very small. I’m familiar with the area where you live, having once lived in the same area for a while and know there are plenty of pro dommes doing business there. You shouldn’t find it hard to find one with an internet search.

Unfortunately, seeing a dominatrix is a luxury and isn’t cheap. Most charge around $300 per hour. Some charge a lot more. Also, while many do offer cuckolding services, it won’t be a true cuckolding experience with a pro. It will be much more of a voyeuristic than cuckolding experience, since you must be in an actual relationship with a woman for her to cuckold you. Maybe lower your expectations by omitting the cuckolding and focus on the domination aspects.

Again, probably not what you wanted to hear, but I’m certain, given your circumstances, seeing a professional domme is the most realistic option.

Punishment Pins Question

The third question I received this month was about punishment pins, sometimes called anti-pullout pins. Specifically, the reader was interested in knowing more about the punishment pins that Mature Metal offers as an option with the Jail Bird chastity device. I’ve already replied to the reader by email, but it occurred to me pullout pins aren’t something I’ve ever covered on the blog.

Actually, I have never used punishment pins with a chastity device. To be honest, that’s because I’m not interested in using them. But pcguy at Thrill of the Chaste has, and he’s written several posts about his experiences, beginning here for anyone interested. Besides those posts, I’ve also read about the experiences others have had using the pins in various chastity forums.

The Mature Metal punishment pins come in three sizes (short, medium, and long) with three tip options (blunt, crisscross, and spike). Based on what I’ve read, the short pins are tolerable but the longer ones can cause significant discomfort when the cage contents attempt to get hard. I doubt any of them are tolerable for extended periods of time, as one guy mentioned he couldn’t sleep with the pins in because it made nocturnal erections very painful.

Just from looking at the images on the MM website, I’d worry the spike pins could possible break the skin, which wouldn’t be good. And I read other guys saying the pins caused bruising and sore spots when they used them for only a few days. Lastly, I read an online article that said punishment pins could potentially cause nerve damage. None of that sounds fun to me so I’ll take a miss on using punishment pins.

chastity device wear

Measuring For A Chastity Device

By Chaste on Friday, December 11, 2020

I see endless chastity forum posts every week about chastity device fitting problems, so I have created this quick start measuring for a chastity device guide.

Poorly Fitted Chastity Device Complaints

The two most common complaints I see about poorly fitting chastity devices concern the base ring. The first is the ring causes wearers discomfort or pain all the time. The other is that when the wearer’s penis attempts to become erect, the base ring behind the balls slides up and “chokes” the testicles causing discomfort or pain. Getting accurate measurements before buying a chastity device will usually help you avoid both issues.

In the past, I’ve always pointed guys to the measuring guide on the Mature Metal website. But recently, I discovered they changed it. I expect they were trying to improve it, but I think the guide is now less clear and less useful. That’s why I have created this measuring guide. It will work for most ball-trap devices.

I’ve aimed the guide at those who plan to order a custom-made device. However, taking proper measurements before buying an off the shelf device is never a waste of time. Many manufacturers are now providing at least some basic measurements you can use to choose a better fitting cage or tube.

The three measurements you need are flaccid penis length, circumference of the soft penis shaft, and the circumference of an imaginary circle running around the base of your penis behind your balls.

How to Measure Penis Length

Always measure when your penis is flaccid, soft, but not “shriveled.” Penises regularly shrink and expand in length while flaccid. That is amply illustrated by the image below that I found on Wikipedia.

As the image shows, there is a wide variance in the length of the same penis photographed at six different times.

The imaged labeled 1 depicts a semi-erect penis. In image 2, the penis is returning to its normal flaccid state. Based on my experiences, image 3 depicts a flaccid penis. That’s what I most often see when I look at my penis inside a chastity cage.

The penis starts in image 4, moving toward a “shriveled” state. The state of the penis in image 3, I believe, is the flaccid length most useful for chastity device measurements.

If you measured your penis length in the state depicted in image 2, you would probably find that most of the time the tip of the penis would not touch the end of the cage or tube.

To get the most accurate measurements for a chastity device, take measurements at different times of day over two or three days. Then use the shortest measurement you obtained.

Some chastity device manufacturers like Mature Metal ask you to measure the underneath side of your penis from your balls to the tip. Others ask you to measure from the top from base to tip. Make sure to follow the appropriate instructions as that is how the manufacturer accounts for the gap between the cage and base ring. If you can’t find on their website which measurement a manufacturer uses, call or email and find out.

Whether you measure from the bottom or top, a ruler is the best device for measuring length. If you measure the underneath side of your penis, take care not to press the end of the ruler into your scrotum. The ruler should only lightly touch the skin.

Always record your measurements. Don’t rely on memory.

After taking several penis length measurements at different times of day over several days, choose the smallest measurement. You should then subtract a small amount.

Mature Metal suggests subtracting 1/4-inch. That’s what I did when I ordered my first Mature Metal cage. As it turned out, the cage is about 1/2-inch too long, and the tip of my penis rarely touches the end.

That wasn’t the fault of Mature Metal. They built what I asked for. And I feel sure I took accurate measurements. So that told me subtracting 1/4-inch is not enough. Since the cage was about 1/2-inch too long, I now subtract 3/4-inch from my smallest length measurement when ordering custom-made cages. I recommend never subtracting less than 1/2-inch.

You can’t really go too short. You can easily compress your soft penis. If you push your flaccid penis toward your body, it easily compresses to half its normal length or less. If you keep pushing, it will “turtle” inside your body and disappear. The real problems with chastity cages occur when they are too long, and most guys buy devices with cages that are too long. That sets them up for attempted erection problems. More on that when we get to measuring for base rings.

Measuring Penis Circumference

The penis circumference measurement is very important for several reasons. Chastity device fabricators use this measurement to calculate the internal diameter of the cage or tube. Custom manufacturers can change the length of the cage or tube, the ring size, and the gap if needed, but they can not change the internal diameter of a cage. Whatever you order as the inside diameter, you can’t alter later.

This measurement is important because you want the cage or tube to “fit like a glove,” with your penis always touching the sides, bottom, and top of the cage or tube. Extra space inside the cage or tube will likely cause you problems during attempted erections. Erections don’t stop until your penis feels compression from the inside of the device.

If you can easily insert your flaccid penis into a cage or tube, then the interior diameter is too big. You will most often have to apply a little lubricant with a properly fitted device and work your penis into the cage or else use the “stocking method” to coax it fully into the tube.

The flaccid penis is extremely squishy. You can compress it to half or less of its normal circumference without any pain. There isn’t much risk that you’re going to strangle your penis by choosing a close-fitting cage or tube. A tip I’ve learned and use is to take your smallest penis circumference measurement and subtract 1/4-inch to get the best fit.

You don’t want the inside diameter so small that it compresses your flaccid penis, but you want a snug fit. Although soft penises are very malleable, what you don’t want is to compress your penis both in length and circumference at the same time. If you constrict the diameter too much while compressing the length any appreciable amount, you can restrict urine flow through the urethra. That’s why micro-chastity device cages only cover the glans of the penis. Those devices already compress the length of the penis to an extreme. By covering only the glans, it prevents compression of the shaft’s circumference at the same time. Urine flow through the uretha is not hampered.

I recommend using a soft tailor’s measuring tape to measure penis circumference. The measurement will be more accurate than trying to eyeball it by placing your penis on top of a ruler. You can pick up a soft tape for a dollar or two from most discount stores.

If you don’t have a tailor’s tape and don’t want to buy one, you can use the string method. Wrap a length of the string (an old shoelace works well) snugly around your penis. Then mark with a felt pen where the end of your string touches the rest of the string. Stretch out your string along a ruler and see where the felt mark is. That’s the circumference.

Base Ring Measurement

The easiest and most accurate method of measuring for a base ring is to spend $25 to buy the plastic sizing ring assortment from Mature Metal. Then you will have actual rings to try on, wear, and experiment with until you find a comfortable fit.

You will find that you can get several different sizes on. The way you can know which one is the right size is by using the fingertip test. With a properly sized base ring, you should be able to easily insert one fingertip between your skin and the inside of the ring. If you can’t, the ring is too small. If you can get two or more fingertips inside, the ring is too large.

If you don’t want to spend the twenty-five bucks, you can go old school and use either the tailor’s measuring tape or string method described in the previous section.

The thing is, the base ring size isn’t usually going to be a problem. You can get that a little off and still be fine. One of the two base ring issues I mentioned earlier—the ring rides up during an attempted erection and digs painfully into the balls—isn’t a base ring problem. It’s a cage length problem. When the cage is too long, it encourages the erection to continue. The tip of the expanding penis pushes against the end of the cage, which causes the cage to pull against the base ring. That’s always uncomfortable.

If the base ring is too small, that can be why a base ring causes constant discomfort. If the ring is too large, you may have problems with a ball popping out of the ring. Also, an oversized ring allows the device to rotate around your scrotum and penis base, which can cause friction chafing. That’s all unnecessary as the base ring measurement is probably the easiest measurement to get right, except for guys who buy the cheaper off the shelf cages where they only give you three ring size options to choose from.

Gap Measurement

The distance between the cage entrance and the base ring is called the gap. Even in the 21st Century, with all the world’s advanced technology, there is no way to measure the gap before ordering a chastity device. It remains a guesstimate subject to trial and error. But chastity device manufacturers do have some advice on the gap.

Mature Metal says ninety-percent of their customers order a 3/8-inch gap and are happy with it. Based on experience, I agree with that. I have a high and tight scrotum with average-sized balls, and 3/8-inch works for me. I once tried a 1/4-inch gap to solve a ball-popping from the base ring problem with one of my devices, but it was too close. The narrower gap caused me worse problems of its own.

If you have a loose, low rider style scrotum, a 1/4-inch gap might be a better fit. Also, guys with high and tight scrotums and larger balls might need to step up to a 1/2-inch gap to gain more comfort.

My advice is to go with the 3/8-inch gap unless there is a good reason not to. If you should find you need something different, it’s an easy fix for your device manufacturer.

Summary

Now for a quick review, and yes, this will be on the test.

Always measure when your penis is truly flaccid, not semi-erect or shriveled.

Take multiple measurements at different times of day over two or three days. Select the smallest measurement taken for length, circumference, and base ring.

From your shortest penis length measurement, subtract at least 1/4-inch, although subtracting 1/2-inch will probably give you a better fit, and in my opinion, subtracting 3/4-inch an even better fit.

From your shortest penis circumference measurement, subtract 1/4-inch.

Best practice is to buy and use a set of sizing rings to determine base ring size. A custom-made chastity device is a big investment, and it’s worth an extra twenty-five bucks to get it right the first time. Getting the wrong size base ring and having to buy another one will usually set you back about $80.

Go with a 3/8-inch gap unless you have a good reason to go smaller or larger.

Disclaimer: All penises are different. I’ve learned what works for me from trial and error and believe you can benefit from my experience. But your mileage may vary.

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