31 Days of Chastity Meme Day 4: Partners

I edited Tickleberry’s original question for today to fit my circumstances. They aimed the original more at those whose wife or other partner acts as keyholder. If you’ve followed this blog at all, then you know I have only had professional keyholders, including the one I have now, my long distance Domme Lucie. So, obviously, I asked all of them to lock me and, in return, gave them a financial tribute to enforce my chastity. That’s a fair arrangement, if you ask me, and the arrangement that works best for me since I’m not in a relationship and am not looking to get into one.

Lucie is unique. In the past, I have engaged a pro keyholder whenever I felt the need for a break from self-locking. Except for my very first keyholder and Lucie, those were only one-month commitments, and afterwards I returned to self-locking. That’s what I had in mind when I first applied to Lucie for keyholding services. But my relationship with her has been so amazing I haven’t wanted to end it. The chemistry between us only grows stronger, and I’m not sure I ever want to end it. On 9 October, I will have been with Lucie for five months.

Our relationship has changed a lot since my first time with Lucie. That’s because we have become well-acquainted and she knows me much better now, what things turn me on and make me feel submissive and which ones do little of either. While she is still very strict, which I love, she isn’t as mean to me as she was at the start.

We have a lot of kinks in common, so most things Lucie tasks me to do are things I enjoy as much as she does. I’ve even come to like some things Lucie enjoys I wasn’t particularly crazy about at first, because it has become so important to me to please her. Lucie and I understand each other and respect each other’s boundaries. She was very clear at the beginning our arrangement wasn’t a boyfriend-girlfriend thing and that was great for me because I wasn’t looking for that. Not to mention we live on different continents.

Having had more than a few unpleasant experiences with guys she played with becoming infatuated with her, Lucie kept things strictly professional at the beginning. But now that she has gotten to know me better and we’ve built trust, she treats me more like a friend. Not to say she has relaxed any of the boundaries that exist naturally between a Domme and her sub. And I wouldn’t want her to do that.

Compared to the other professionals I’ve played with, the tributes Lucie asks for are so minimal. Especially since she also puts so much more time and effort into our dynamic than any previous keyholder that I’ve had ever did. In fact, she often extends our play far beyond when it has been due to end. For example, our session (for lack of a better term) before Locktober was supposed to last for one month. Instead, Lucie kept extending it until eleven weeks had passed by the time September ended and Locktober began. Even though I twice offered to tribute her for the extra time, she wouldn’t allow it, saying she enjoyed playing with me and said, “naturally you pay less.” I feel a little conflicted about it, honestly. Yes, I appreciate her generosity, but I know the time and attention Lucie devotes to me is time and attention someone else could pay for. But it’s her decision. I’ve strayed from the topic at hand, so let’s get back to it.

While I haven’t had the experience that many guys have had, having to figure out some way to bring up their desire to a wife or other partner, I did have a conversation with Lucie at the beginning during which I’ll bet I felt just as nervous. Ours took place on a video call and I had to explain why I felt an attraction to chastity, share what other kinks I was interested in and enjoyed, and list my hard limits. Lucie listened intently and asked questions about the things she wanted to know more about.

Not that every guy would feel this way, but I found it far more embarrassing spilling all my kinky secrets face-to-face to a perfect stranger, a drop-dead gorgeous stranger at that, than I would have had discussing it with someone I’d seen naked and had sex with. But Lucie was great about it, although she now uses everything I told her against me when teasing me. But the discussion was important because Lucie needed to know what type of submissive I was.

There are many types of submissive men, ranging from rather mild to rather extreme. While the stereotypical view of submissive men are that they are weak and unmanly, even effeminate, it takes strength and courage to give up control and submit to another person. And Lucie understands that. She also knows not all submissive men want to wear women’s clothes or to become a sissy. Not judging any of that, but I’m not that type of submissive guy. While I desire to put my dominant’s desires and pleasure before mine, I prefer to remain in my natural masculine role. Yes, Lucie sometimes uses that against me too for laughs, but she never tries to emasculate me. Part of it is she knows what works and what doesn’t in leading me where she wants to take me. But I think Lucie prefers masculine men because she finds persuading them to submit to her far more satisfying.

That wraps the discussion for this fourth day of the 31 Days of Chastity Meme on this fourth day of Locktober 2023. Hope you will return tomorrow when I’ll share about my first time locked in chastity in response to these questions:

What was your first time in Chastity like? How long were you locked? What did it feel like and what happened on your release?