Chastity relationships versus non-chastity relationships. Are the dynamics of all healthy relationships the same? I weigh in with my opinions in today’s 31 Days of Chastity Meme Day 22 post.
What do you think is important in keeping a Chastity relationship healthy? Would this be any different in a non-Chastity relationship?
Experts tell us that healthy relationships involve honesty, trust, respect and open communication between partners and they take effort and compromise from both people. Those are all things that I agree are necessary in all relationships, whether we’re talking about chastity or non-chastity relationships. But the experts also say that there is no imbalance of power in a healthy (non-chastity) relationship. Partners respect each other’s independence, can make their own decisions without fear of retribution or retaliation, and share decisions. Here is where healthy chastity relationships diverge from more vanilla style relationships.
By definition, chastity relationships involve a power exchange. The chastised male literally surrenders his sex life to his partner (or other keyholder), giving them full control over when or if he gets sexual pleasure. Once another holds the key to his chastity device, he can no longer get normal erections, play with himself, or have orgasms without her knowledge and consent.
That’s a far cry from a balance of power where both partners remain independent and can make their own decisions. At least regarding sex. Not all chastity relationships are full female led relationships, so the locked male may still keep near complete autonomy is most if not all other areas. But along with the chastity device key, the partner often assumes some measure of control over other things, especially those directly related to the chastity dynamic.
For example, she may ask for sexual pleasure whenever she wants it, choose what her partner wears, especially beneath everyday clothing, and assign tasks to her partner like increased household duties responsibilities. So while things like honesty, trust, respect, and open communication between partners are just as necessary to a healthy chastity relationship, there are other things they do not share with vanilla relationships.
The power exchange dynamic promotes deeper, stronger, and better bonds between the partners and defines the respective roles clearly. Most importantly, it makes the chastity relationship fun, exciting, and sexy. The chastity device turns the male’s desire, passion, attention, and energy toward his partner, holding the key. She then gains the power to enforce her desires for the relationship. That doesn’t mean the relationship becomes one-sided.
Chastity benefits both him and her. It’s a major turn on for him because of his loss of control. That’s typically what prompts guys to request chastity to begin with. The increased control she gets can help her grow more confident and more explorative, allowing her to discover more about her own sexual desires. Often he discovers a core need to submit and his partner discovers a core need to dominate. As both feel the freedom to be who they are without hiding it, they find it brings them even closer together. They can experience intimacy on levels beyond anything many vanilla couples never do. Clearly defined roles help build deeper human connections.
Yes, we find commonalities between healthy chastity and vanilla relationships, but the power exchange dynamic in chastity makes them significantly different.
Tomorrow’s post, 31 Days of Chastity Meme Day 23 features this prompt:
Since you first developed an interest in Chastity, has your outlook on life changed? Are these changes good or bad?
31 Days of Chastity Meme
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